Today at my appointment I sat there at 38w5d, uncomfortable as all hell talking to the doctor. I told her how hard it's been to get around and that if a med-free birth wasn't important to me, I would be begging her for an induction. She knows my desire to have an intervention free birth, and for Gavin's birth, she was 100% supportive of my wishes. I learned that I made more progress (going from 3cm to 4cm dilated). She offered to "strip my membranes" if I wanted her to, and after asking her if she ever accidentally broke anyone's water while doing so and her saying no, I let her. She was very honest and said that if my body wasn't ready, this wouldn't do anything, but if it did work, typically it would work in the next 24-72 hours. The reason this is a no-no in the natural birth world (though I trust that my NB mom friends will be supportive and not openly judgemental) is partly because of the risk of infection, which I feel is minimal, plus she's already in there, so I don't think it increases it much. The biggest risk though is that the provider will mistakenly break your water, thus putting you on a clock to have the baby, when he/she may not be ready. And you know, I weighed that risk. I have been thinking about getting this done for a week now- to be honest, I didn't think my doctor would offer it until next week or so. I thought about what could happen, that my water bag would break and I would have to deliver within the next 24-48 hours to avoid a c-section, and that I would likely have to get pitocin to help get labor going. And you know what, if I felt how I did at 30 weeks, I wouldn't have taken the risk. But today, after hardly being able to walk since yesterday morning, after practically needing help to turn over in my bed, after three rounds of false labor, after telling my children I can't hold them for the millionth time, today, the risk was worth it. I am almost 39w, I am on my 3rd pregnancy in four years, and though I do treasure the little kicks and one day I will actually miss being pregnant- I AM DONE. I honestly don't know how I've made it this far...tears, a supportive husband, and ice cream. I've seriously craved ice cream this last trimester.
How did it go? Well, it didn't hurt, that's for sure. My last internal exam was more uncomfortable than this one. I had it done roughly 4.5 hours ago, and I haven't felt anything different. I am trying not to get my hopes up, but I'm failing. I am really praying that he arrives by Sunday. I don't think there will be enough ice cream in the world to help me if I have to get up and go to work Monday morning. Oh, wait...I'm off that day. Okay, he has until Monday then. ;)